Friday, April 10, 2009
sorry i need an outlet.
Ops i did it again.
And all i wanted was for a chance to work things out.
But wanting to work things out is not always letting nature take its course i guess.
I am being myself.
But this time, it seems, I annoyed you.
If being myself annoys you, can we really still be together?
If you cant accept me for who am i, can we really work?
It's true, I love you (still).
Maybe less now.
It's also true, you don't love me (anymore).
Maybe more now.
Maybe I care too much,
That's why it hurts.
Maybe pain will go away itself,
At least you think so.
As usual, I will have to self-heal and forget all the hurting words that you said, forgive that you gave me up so easily and then continue to act as if nothing happened. that is being normal. that is letting nature take its course. I will sacrifice other things just to go out with you, 'cos you mattered. I do things for you, but you don't realize i do them just for you. No, i don't wanna be friends.
I feel much better now.
Maybe, I'm better alone.
Let's stay this way, for awhile.
Don't waver my determination, not you.
(unless you are sure)
I'm going to Vietnam.
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2:22 AM
2:22 AM
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
cloverfield
it disturbed me so much, i had to post this. as fast as i could. (thou i caught the movie on saturday - big SORRY for those who already watched)
it was terrible. and i really did not expect the whole movie to be filmed as a first person experience. it was like an unprofessional enactment of an invasion, as i would call it. the monsters were not accounted for, and the best i could was to infer that it was part of a military experience which turned ugly.
i was hungry before the show, and the show took all of my appetite. motion sickness, geting dizzy and being horribly turned off were among the normal reactions. and i really cannot help to feel the same.
ANIWAYS, it was quite interesting for my electif, media in America. The video about FOX TV was totally enriching, something i would not have known as an average nobody. Woo, power of media, overwhelming.
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12:07 AM
12:07 AM
Monday, January 07, 2008
school
the break is ending, like all good things ever have to come to an end. sigh- like i got to enjoyed much of it, but nm, we must get on with our lives.
and school effectively marks a new year. and i realise i hafnt really set out with my resolutions for the new year. (i just keep saying, my wish is to be lucky) reason? being lucky gets you almost everywhere. you need abit of luck in everything you do.
betting needs alot of luck. exams need alot too. you need luck so you get your bus for the least waiting bus. you need luck so the bird shit lands in front of you rather than on you. luck allows you to meet people you want to meet. and luck allows you love.
so by making the wish, im just being greedy. i wanted love, better grades, winning all my bets and basically have everything fall nicely for you. it sounds impossible, but well, just make me happy. (:
tell me it is possible.
gosh. and school is tomorrow, and im definitely not in the mood to turn in before like 4? (having slept at god knows what time for two odd weeks now.
fun.
but it has to end.
now. its time to get serious.
and i apologise for the delay in uploading the photos during the holidays. HAH...
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2:09 AM
2:09 AM
Friday, December 28, 2007
results.
results was traumatising. absolutely terrible. never mind. im not one who cry over spilled milk. whats done is done. forget.
and its 24hrs past my birthday already. so so fast. to think the last night, we were all having fun alongside my condo pool, all the good food with my best company; bliss. and i have got to thank everyone for coming to my party, at such short notice (im so sorry), but more than that, i want to thank everyone of my friends for being part of my life. im nothing without you people.
sometimes i wish i was a better spokesman. someone who can talk better. someone who can turn stones into gold with their words. someone who can make an impact with their speech. i cant, and i doubt i ever can. stage fright, and perhaps the fear of failure? ah, singaporean syndrome, no im not blaming on my homeland.
so much i want to say as always; i realise pictures tell a thousand words. i shall upload photos instead, maybe tomorrow. need to kick the nocturnal habit out.
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11:15 PM
11:15 PM
Tuesday, November 27, 2007
fabulicious 5 days
counting down, its like... 1,2,3,4,5 days past the exams only, but the fun i had was like, enough to intoxicate my life! (and it's so not going to end here.)
right after the exams on thursday, we head to fish & co. for some 'good food'. (not my favourite, by any means) i just had to order the seafood platter and make sure i fill my poor stomach with some yummilicious food after the long starvation period. woot.
then it was mahjong overnight with prata supper in between. everyone was dying from the late nights from studying, but still, we just continued playing. the only reward i tell myself was a 24hr sleep the day after. oh, and prata bom is a killer. it is like so ahhh, wtf shiok, as what joanne describes, "happy food". but if you are going to have it everyday, prepare to put on weight.
slept the whole friday, until late at night. went to catch 'the kingdom' at vivo. turned out to be quite a good show, if you are not anti documentary. not the kind of shows you will watch with girls too. but the action and the realism of the show makes people think about the situation in life. the crossfire scenes and the bombings and settings were all planned to perfection, unarguably a well directed film.
kbox on sunday, and im going again in 10hrs. WOW. followed by shopping... and more and more...
and
more
and
more
.
WORK. fcuk, i just refuse to check my school email. work's going to knock on the door, the moment i check the mail, FOR SURE. isg isg isg (inter-school games). canvassing. 3 schools beach event. let me procrastinate....
a while more...! 再给我两分钟! (haha)
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2:20 AM
2:20 AM
Thursday, November 08, 2007
early in the morning
Holy shat!
only my second breakfast in ntu since i came here. shucks*and i was not studying for the whole night really. more like waiting for the manchester match (which turns out to be well-worth it)
well, must really have my toilet mates and chengzhi, who came over, to thank- for keeping me awake, with the pikachu volleyball games, jumping rabbit, facebooking and of cos, the non-stop nonsense blabbering.
gosh. it is 815am.
i just finished chapter 4. and
(:
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8:14 AM
8:14 AM
Monday, November 05, 2007
carefree
im liking the life i lead now. no worries. no hassles. i do things the way i like. i can be selfish at times, (maybe all the time). yes. this is life.
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1:09 PM
1:09 PM